Some Things About Autism

NOTE: I am not a psychologist, or a philosopher, or a physician. 

Alo Party Peoples.

Looking back now, I probably should have waited until I had a higher education before starting a blog. I will still continue the blog, but I feel that I have a lack of understanding of my topics because of my not having any formal higher education on the subjects of fiction, history, film history, or philosophy. Perhaps my condition makes me unable to get into the mindset of those that do have a background in these fields, but I can never know for sure.

Speaking of that condition. People with autism are rather stubborn folks, a lot of things that might be second nature to "normal" people are incomprehensible to us. When we find an idea or mode of thought that we DO understand, we tend to stick with it. It provides a sense of stability in what be a very confusing world. From the outside this can look like stubbornness, or perseveration, or perhaps willful ignorance, but if it does, I assure you that this is not our intent. At least in my experience, the problem is that the "neurotypical" mindset is SO different, so alien to us, that we just cannot wrap our heads around it. I am tempted to compare it to trying to understand a god, but that is probably too extreme. I don't think of you as gods.

Please allow me to mention some myths about autism, and explain my views about them.

-IT DOESN'T EXIST: Yes it does. There can be mis-diagnoses, and over-diagnoses, and under-diagnoses, but that happens for every condition. If everything were able to be understood immediately by everyone, then we wouldn't need doctors or teachers.

-IT'S THE VACCINES: No. That view is coming from just plain junk-science. Take some time out of your day and go watch this video here. It is from a liscenced pediatrician that treats kids with autism, and he is a smart guy. I don't think that the views of those that believe autism makes people somehow lesser are intentional malice, but are instead based in simple ignorance.

-THEY ARE JUST STUPID: No. For kids with autism, the world can be a very confusing place. It can seem overwhelming, we have problems with loud sounds, and to a lesser extent, at least for me, bright colors. Certain textures are uncomfortable to us, even unbearable, and our perception can make these things seem more intense. We have trouble with verbal communication and abstract language. It might seem like we are slow, or insubordinate. But on the high functioning end at least, we don't intend to seem that way.

-IT IS JUST AN EXCUSE FOR BAD BEHAVIOR: No. Autistic kids, hell autistic people, think in a fundamentally different way than "normal" people. We have trouble empathizing with others, we genuinely don't get what's wrong. That being said, when we DO realize that there is a problem, we feel terrible about it.

-THEY ARE SADISTS: Oh God no. Please let me share a personal story. Around eighth grade I had eaten my older sisters ice cream. She wanted me to pay her back so she took me to the bank to get money out of my savings account. I couldn't find my school ID with a photo of myself on it, so we grabbed one that was issued before photos were taken. We got to the bank and when we showed them the ID, they rejected it. After leaving, she started yelling at me about how I made her look like she was trying to steal money. I had no idea what she was talking about. Looking back now, I know what she meant and I am deeply regretful about this. If my older sister is reading this, I'm sorry.

We might be less expressive than "normal" people, but we still feel emotion. In fact, we might feel it more deeply than neurotypical people. If it looks like we are being manipulative, or scheming, or even condescending towards you, we are NOT trying to be that way.

I will close out with this. The world is a tough place to live in. For those that differ from the majority, it is even worse. This can lead to a feeling of inadequacy, especially if you don't have context for what's wrong. Hell, that was me for the longest time. I prayed, begging for God or whoever's in charge to "fix" me, make me "normal", make me "better".

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Have a nice day, you lucky people.

Greg.B